Someday…perhaps…

SUNshine is thinking about someone…

SUNshine is dead tired today! Surgeons start work very early so that OT time won’t be delayed (I think!). They are always rushing to finish morning ward rounds so that they can start cutting people up at 8am sharp!

I’m not physically tired but mentally. I think cos I gotta keep learning and putting info into my not-so-big pinky brain!

When I came back from uni today, I was so tired I didn’t know what to do. I tried sleeping, but I couldn’t. I tried playing games, wondered if I should eat but didn’t have the appetite, couldn’t bear reading another word and therefore couldn’t check out my FB, chat on MSN or read emails.

In moments like this, I know my remedy I quickly listened to some praise and worship songs and just be in the Presence of God. Then I read some entries that Pastor Kong put up as daily devotion on his blog everyday. Fooohhhh!! You won’t believe how renewed and strengthened I feel now!

No wonder Jesus called those who are burdened and tired to go to Him and He truly promises to give us rest. And no wonder the Bible tells us that in the Presence of God is rest, peace, joy and those who wait upon the Lord shall have their strength renewed. Amazing how real it is!

And this…is called the anointing!

Fooohhhh!!! Back to my notes! Surgery is frustrating! Haha! I’m more frustrated than nervous about my exams next week! So much to learn, so much to understand and remember and so little time!

Semangat SUNshine! C’mon! Semangat ya!

SUNshine gotta be up real early tomorrow morning. Case presentation with the great surgeon at 7am tomorrow morning! Goodness!

SUNshine just heard one of the most difficult sermons to swallow down/digest/accept! It’s “The Sufferings of Job (Part A)” by Pst Kong. CLICK HERE to listen to it

It’s difficult to accept because it’s the hard truth! He preached on true maturity in Christ. Although God promised many blessings for His children aka us, in reality, we see a lot of suffering, we ourselves go through very bad times. Even people who love God with all their hearts and lay down their lives to serve God go through much suffering. Why do bad things happen to good people, righteous people, holy people?

The truth is this: True maturity is total abandonement to God’s will. When our world falls apart and we lose everything (and I mean EVERYTHING!),  are we still going to love God, bless His name, praise Him and worship Him or are we going to curse Him right at His face?

One man that God Himself called the most righteous man on earth lost everything. His name is Job. And yet, through it all, he could praise God, fall on his knees to worship Him and trust in Him. And he understood that all these trials will make him come forth as gold (Job 23:10).

One thing that I always tell God is: I can lose anything and everything, but I cannot lose Him. Sometimes, I really wonder how I would react when I really lose everything! God forbid that day!

But I realise no matter how much pain I feel, how heartbroken I am, how disappointed I am, how ill I am, how upset I am, I could never bring myself to curse the name of God. I mean..how do you do that?! I may sulk, I may cry, but I made a decision to always, in every season, bring a sacrifice of praise to God and be thankful.

Yet, I think this sermon is difficult to swallow and my highest respect to Job who went through that. I so hope I can shake his hand in heaven one day! Haha….

Oh dear! SUNshine has been so busy, this blog seems to be dying! So sorry to my friends who read my blog for updates and random readers too! I’ve repented!

Just a quick update on myself. I’m currently in Surgery posting, exactly mid-point of my posting! Much to study, much to learn! And it doesn’t help when what I see in the wards are different from what I read from books!

I’ve also just returned from Padang, Indonesia for relief work. It was an amazing experience! Glad to have been able to use what God has given me to help others. I would so love to blog all about it and post up loads of pictures, but I don’t have the pics yet! I’ll blog about it, especially on my personal thoughts and experiences real soon. After my surgery exams and when I get the pictures ya

For a report on that trip, do visit www.chc.org.my You can watch the video announcements on the left. Do wait for yours truly to appear and share about the trip. It’s not the first annoucement

Unfortunately, 5 out of 7 of the team from Singapore and KL were ill when we came back. The 3 of us from KL had diarrhoea since last Sunday! I had diarrhoea 20 times in 24 hours exactly 1 week ago! That’s a record! Haha…I vomited once also and was very nauseated. So, with much output and not much input, I was very lethargic. But I’m much better now. Although my tummy still hurts when I try to eat a normal diet and I still get diarrhoea once or twice a day, I’m very much back on my feet. Just that I hope I can eat more than plain porridge, plain bread and plain crackers without abdominal discomfort! I lost 1kg in this 1 week! Good news but I prefer to have my appetite back le. But I was really touched by how everyone in church, especially the leaders kept praying for us and were so concerned. My family was amazing in supporting me too!

Emerge fever is very much ON in church now! For more details, do check out www.emergekl.my

I’ve much thoughts, but very little time to blog about them. More to come real soon ya!

Keep on praying for me ya. I really want to be strong and healthy to be more productive!

She’s Out Of My Life
She’s Out Of My Life
And I Don’t Know Whether To Laugh Or Cry
I Don’t Know Whether To Live Or Die
And It Cuts Like A Knife
She’s Out Of My Life

It’s Out Of My Hands
It’s Out Of My Hands
To Think For Two Years She Was Here
And I Took Her For Granted I Was So Cavalier
Now The Way That It Stands
She’s Out Of My Hands

So I’ve Learned That Love’s Not Possession
And I’ve Learned That Love Won’t Wait
Now I’ve Learned That Love Needs Expression
But I Learned Too Late

She’s Out Of My Life
She’s Out Of My Life
Damned Indecision And Cursed Pride
Kept My Love For Her Locked Deep Inside
And It Cuts Like A Knife
She’s Out Of My Life

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Are you out of my life? Wonder if it was my fault. Did I do say/do anything wrong? Wonder if there’s anything that I can do to restore the friendship at least. Well…to at least say hi when we meet?

Wish I could be there to walk with you in every step of life. To support you and cheer you on. But I don’t know how to gain access to that position once again.

Just be happy and do well please. Praying for you and cheering you on..from afar

as always, you’re greatly missed.

but it’s great watching you from afar. no one gets hurt that way

sure hope what’s displayed from the outward reflects what’s truly in you: happy, doing well, satisfied, loved, working so hard doing great things.

so proud of you.

praying for you really works!

please finally have the courage to breakthrough fast.

that way, i can really let go and leave…for good.

tomorrow is finally here!

am i ready? hmph…

i know it’ll be great! it’ll be refreshing and it’ll be a great blessing!

stay tuned for the details when i come back

“True love is wishing you to always be happy, even if it means not having me in your future. To have come to such a decision would mean that we have gone through a bad patch of sorts, and it had come to a point where the issue cannot be mended.”

Flashes of memories fill her mind as she read through the words that he wrote months back. One fear that filled her heart as these words repeated themselves like an echo in her heart: Have they reached a point where the issue cannot be mended? Is he leaving her because he thinks she is happier without him in her future?

But if that’s his mindset and decision, does that mean his love for her is true? And if his love for her is true and she’s sure her love for him is true, why can’t they be together? Why choose a path where both of them will hurt and be in pain, rather than a path where both will be happy and fulfilled?

A greater fear crept in her heart as she ponders upon the never ending questions: It’s simple. He has never loved her. That would still explain why he’s leaving her and why 2 people who have true love for one another chose not to be together.

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Disclaimer: This is yet another fiction post by the author from an inspiration after reading something her friend posted. This post has nothing to do with anyone dead or alive that the author knows.

It looks good, smells good, tastes good and you want it. But whether it’ll do you good is another story altogether.

For as long as Strawberry doesn’t leave Chocolate, Chocolate will find it close to impossible to get rid of Strawberry. Chocolate sticks on to Strawberry. Perhaps the only way out is for Strawberry to leave Chocolate. And Chocolate just has to wait till that happens.

But perhaps, Strawberry will not leave Chocolate and the Chocolate-coated Strawberry will still look good, smell good, taste good and do you good.

Only time can tell.

SUNshine went swimming again today (considering the wedding is only 14 days away!She needs to work harder!). I was really thrilled cos I love, love, love this particular pool that I went to. The only frustration she had was to look for the pool! Every building in that area was labelled “Kementerian Belia dan Sukan Malaysia”!

Anyways, I was all set to swim my laps and I saw something funny while swimming my first lap itself. There was a hot girl wearing a bikini who was standing tip-toed in the middle of the pool, right in front of me! I was just thinking, “What’s with her? Why is she posing in the middle of the pool? Does she have a muscle cramp? But she doesn’t look like she’s in distress or troubled.”

So, I continued swimming and thought I probably I can just avoid her so that she can continue “posing” there. I checked her facial expression again when I was nearer to make sure she really wasn’t in distress or any trouble. She looked fine! The moment I thought she was fine, I felt her grabbing me from the back!

Crap! She WAS in trouble and great! Now I have to rescue her cos I was the only thing person she could hold on to. So, I took a deep breath and swam to the side of the pool with all my might! Here goes dT aka Little Miss SUNshine, the superhero in the making, rescuing a hot chic in distress!

The problem was, she kept pulling me into the water! Good Lord! So poor not-so-sunny-anymore-superhero choked the-Lord-knows-how-much-of-chlorinated-water! And the most stupid unbelievable part of it all was: There were 2 lifeguards sitting right in front of us! They were watching us and only threw the float to her when poor superhero girl managed to drag both of them to the side of the pool! Sial! Waliao!

But oh well, she apologised and thanked me anyway. SUNshine was glad she didn’t have to do any first aid and check for ABC and call the ambulance! I rather choke chlorinated water!

But there were a few lessons I learnt:

1. I should have kicked her away from me and let her drown! The lifeguards would probably have noticed and all she’ll get is water in her lungs!

1. Hot hunks who will take off their shirts and jump into the water to rescue those near-drowning only exist in Baywatch!

2. Don’t try to drown the person who is trying to save you from drowning! Just relax and let her save you!

3. If you’re a lifeguard, watch the pool properly and not yack with your friend or have super delayed response! Super lag man!

4. If you’re a guy and you’re trying to teach 2 hot girls how to swim, don’t leave them to drown! Watch them properly la. Yup..that girl was there with another hot girl and a guy who was  trying to teach them how to swim! He  came after we finished coughing all the chlorinated water out from our airway!

5. It’s always good to be properly trained in swimming and lifesaving! Even if you don’t save anyone in your lifetime, you yourself won’t drown at least! Haha…

On a more touching and inspiring note, SUNshine also noted something when she went swimming today. I saw something at poolside when I was about to jump into the pool and when I got out too. This was what I saw:

Yup! A pair of lower limb orthosis and forearm crutches! He not only can swim, but I saw him walking towards his car after swimming and drove his car away! All by himself! WOW! I love seeing the disabled being so independent. I know they are able to, but not many, especially in our society actually believe that they can.

So, here goes my splashing story! Haha…quite an experience! Scary though :S But it did support my proposal to my parents to allow me to go for proper swimming lessons and now, lifesaving course!