A great week! :)

SUNshine has a break this week and it’s fun and busy! Thank God I’ve got a little break!

I just finished getting the health screen going, with the guidelines and training done. The most difficult part of this was planning it and deciding on the guidelines. Thank God for a tutor who is an Infectious Disease specialist! Getting the stock (masks, thermometer, handsanitizer) was another headache. For one, stock is running low and prices are going up! Thank God we got really good deals because the Lord knows how long we have to do this healthscreen thingie!

Out of this “not-so-pleasant” health emergency, there are good things that came out of it. 1. I learnt a lot planning for this health screen. 2. Working with the ushers taught me a lot about dealing with people and handling stress! They are simply amazing! No wonder their bosses at work love them so much! Now I know! 3. Getting in contact with the healthcare workers in church is fun too! I believe it’s a beginning to something great in future! Can’t tell you the plan we have in mind yet. Stay tuned!

I also had the time to hang out with some friends and just chill. It’s not work, or follow-up. It’s just loving people and being with people and being happy. I love singing karaoke with them and we really had a great deal! Paid Rm10 and we got to eat lunch and sing for 4 hours! Great deal! Shopping and talking with my bestie was fun too. And today I had a great meal with Ianz and we had a great swim together! Apart from that, we had a really good time celebrating Pastor’s birthday and had a good chat at the hospital when we went to visit Jin (ok..that’s not a happy thing!)

Wish I always have time to be with people, hear their stories, bless them and just spend time with them. This is something I always have to consciously remind myself to set aside time to do. Ultimately, I think, my passion in life is people. I’m blessed to be called into a profession where it is all about people and my ministry is all about people. I believe the greatest passion in God’s heart really is people.

Tomorrow, SUNshine is praying for a good meeting. Real good one! And then the great weekend begins! It’s gonna be so good! Dear Lord, give us wisdom with crowd control!

Busy bee!

WOW! SUNshine is so tired! So much to do and so much to study! Phew!

But I rather be busy doing stuff that will lead me to the destiny God has placed in my life than to be free not having a vision to pursue. But then again, it’s always good to check and make sure what you’re doing will actually lead you to your destiny! Haha..wouldn’t wanna be dead tired doing things that eventually mean nothing and lead you nowhere! It’s called wasting your time.

Dr Bernard taught us that purpose defines tasks. It’s so important! Your purpose ought to define the tasks that you do each day. If not, you’re merely wasting your time and effort. Or you’ll probably wake up one day not knowing why you do the things you do.

Aaahhh….SUNshine feel like fainting looking at the stuff she has to study, remember and do! So much admin work! So much to keep in mind! And so much to do! But it’s all good.

And yeah…in the midst of being very busy and hectic, whenever I have a little time, I tend to think and miss the people I love. Aawww….sweet eh? Just said a little prayer for the significant ones. Dear God, please take care of them while I can’t. I miss you …

If you love SUNshine too, pray for me ya! I need strength and fruitfulness! Phew! Jiayou!

D-Day

Aahh…SUNshine just heard another awesome sermon by Pst Phil! Feel a little troubled cos it was a strong one! Strong….*shakes head*

The title of his sermon is D-Day. It was a tough one to take! Because he preached what it takes to be a man/woman of God! How the trials and difficulties bring us to our destiny, how we have to be patient and wait upon the Lord, how pits, fires and lions and enemies buff us up strong enough to carry the vision of God. How every dream has to die first before it can be resurrected. How pain itself is what prepares us to do what God has destined for us to do. That’s a tough one!

Suddenly I understood some of the difficulties that I went through. The disappointments that I couldn’t believe happened to people who love God like me! I still remember the pain and disbelief I felt! I could not comprehend what was going on, but one thing I was sure, God loves me and He knows what He’s doing. No matter how out of control it felt, He definitely was still in control. And now I also know, it’s during those times that we really experience the faithfulness of God. And the taste of that goodness will keep us strong enough for the battles ahead! The more battles you win, the more victorious you are. The greater the sacrifice, the greater the glory!

WOW! I’m grateful God picked me to go through this kinda fire and opened my eyes to comprehend how things work. And how blessed to be learning all these in the days of my youth! It’s tough, but it’ll be glorious!

So c’mon, shout to God with a voice of triumph! ROARRRRRR!!!!!

But God

SUNshine got some really sad news yesterday from someone she really loves. It was heartbreaking.

Wish there’s something I can do for her, wish I can be there for her. But I can’t. This is a very helpless situation.

SUNshine is very much encouraged by Pst Phil Pringle’s sermon “But God”. It’s so encouraging I’m currently listening to it the 2nd time! Back to back! Haha….

It has been hectic and draining and tiring for SUNshine. Not just there’s much to do, but much drama has been happening..so that’s emotionally draining as well! And I hope this doesn’t make me sound emo: Watching people die at A&E and seeing people real sick and emergency situations IS draining! I don’t cry and feel bad when I go back when I see patients die now. But, it’s nevertheless unpleasant and makes my heart heavy. And one very respected lecturer told us this last week: “After 16 years of practice, I still feel something when I lose patients. The day you are numb to seeing people die is the day you should change your profession!”

To tops it all, SUNshine got some horrid news last night. It’s just heartbreaking to know someone you love so dearly is going through a rough patch and you can’t do anything to improve that situation. I spent more than an hour just listening to her talk. Wish I have the cash to just buy flight tickets and fly over to be with her next week when I have a break! Aih…

Oh yeah..back to Pst Phil’s sermon. I love this sermon! The Bible mentions “but God” many, many times. I love it! Joseph’s brothers meant evil to him, BUT GOD meant it for good. The soldiers crucified Jesus, BUT GOD resurrected Him on the 3rd day. Haman wanted all Jews to be killed, BUT GOD raised a beautiful woman, Esther, to save His people. They threw 3 men into the fiery furnace, BUT GOD was with them. I’m drained out BUT GOD is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. I’m anxious about the future BUT GOD has plans to prosper me and give me a hope in future. BUT GOD….

I love being on God’s side..or more like, God being on my side! It’s like guaranteed success! Because of “BUT GOD” impossible becomes possible, the natural will be interfered by the supernatural… Love it!

One more thing that he taught that hit me. Before we knew God, we had no conscience. We don’t feel bad for the bad things we do. But after knowing God and His holiness, our conscience is being sensitized, sometimes, over-sensitized! We are very aware of the wrong things we do, the not-good-enough. If we gave RM100, we wish we gave RM200. We wish we can be better for God. It needs to be balanced with FAITH. If not, it will be a bottomless pit of condemnation! WOW! Powerful revelation!

I can’t be with that someone I love so dearly now to sort her problems out and help her out of it. BUT GOD is with her. I can’t make those losers who plotted evil against her to back off, die or repent, BUT GOD will not allow evil to befall her!

BUT GOD always have a way…

BUT GOD can do all things..

BUT GOD chose to love us…

BUT GOD…

BUT GOD…

BUT GOD…

the last man

it has been awhile now. it’s good to see you doing well.

it’s also good to see how well you cope and keep pushing me away. it helps to kill the emotions. you’ve done well in making me feel scared to appoach you without first being invited. you’re so high up, i can’t reach you. but i’m proud that you’re gaining ground.  

you gave me a good feeling today. the feeling that truly your pride and prejudice has made you the last man on this earth i could ever be prevail to marry. it really helps to kill the emotions and help me to move on.

the emotions have died, but the love hasn’t. don’t get me wrong. i still wake up everyday praying that you’ll have a great day ahead and the works of your hands will prosper. and above all, you’ll be filled with joy, fun and love. still looking forward to see your breakthroughs.

it has been awhile

it has been awhile now.

little birds have been telling me how you’re doing. it’s good that you’re busy and occupied, healthy and happy.

1 year has past and it brought us to a place we least expected. what will the next 1 year bring?

it has been a while now.

the emotions have died, but the love hasn’t.

The big scare

This really seems like a losing battle, a national threat, a fear among people.

The most widely talked topic now is definitely the pandemic H1N1. Not only among the healthcare workers, but also the general public now. It not only makes people sick, reduce productivity due to the many 1-week home leaves, but now, it claims lives too!

In fact, when SUNshine went to KLCC last week, she noticed many people are walking around wearing a mask!

As of the time of this blog entry, the total number of cases in this nation is 2253 with a total of 38 deaths.

And of all postings SUNshine can be doing, she’s currently doing A&E, where most of the patients of ILI (influenza-like illness) will go to! And on the first day of posting itself, SUNshine and 2 friends performed CPR on a poor little girl the moment we arrive for on-call. We didn’t know her story, but just helped out with CPR because it’s a very tiring procedure. It’s common that several doctors/nurses/medical assistants take turns to perform CPR. After she was pronounced dead, and we went to check her file, lo and behold, she presented with fever, cough, flu and sorethroat for 1 week. :S She had other problems, but was suspected of H1N1!!! :S:S:S:S:S:S

So, currently, to be safe, SUNshine is monitoring her temperature for the next 5 days or so. :S Today’s temperature is 37.2 degrees celcius. :S

I think everything’s gonna be alright though.

But this pandemic is really getting out of hand! As a precautionary step, SUNshine’s church is also gonna provide masks, hand sanitizer and thermometer for temperature checking this weekend onwards. So, SUNshine went to hunt for the best deals. Lo and behold, the masks and hand sanitizers are out of stock!!!!!! And the prices are sky-high!!!! Aiyoh..in fact, masks and alcohol-rub are running low in the hospitals! This is scary man!

Nevertheless, I still believe in the standard precautions and preventive measures. Seriously, it’s better than nothing! And among all things, it’s a good thing that I’m obsessed with hand washing and hygiene! Hehe…That’s a good obsession! Hehe…

Unfailing love

“The greatest thing in life is to love and to be loved in return”

SUNshine thinks it’s true. How awesome is it to be madly in love and to know that the other person loves you as much, or even more! It’s an amazing feeling.

This is what exactly SUNshine is feeling now. Overwhelming emotions! Good emotions.

It’s amazing to feel so loved and so willingly to love the other person. And that’s exactly how I feel in this relationship that I have with my Heavenly Father.

Any mention of words or songs or seeing things that remind me of God and His love for me, tears well up in my eyes! Oh man…SUNshine needs to stop crying! How am I going to go to school and hospital like that?! Hahahaha…. But I’m really overwhelmed thinking about the unfailing love that He has for me. The intensity, the passion, the depth, the width, the greatness of this love is just…just…overwhelming!

I really, really love the Presence of God. The awareness that He’s just so close to me. To remember how much He loves me, how He brought me through the difficult times I had, and how He opened Heavens over me that I could enjoy so many good things. Amazing love.

So many people think it’s absurd or ridiculous to even think it’s true or real. So many people think relying on God is a weakness. But until and unless you experience it for yourself, you will never know how real it is! And once you’ve tasted it, you’ll want more! It’s addictive! Haha… And it’ll change your life!

And God is such a passionate lover! Just look at the book of Song of Solomon! Haha…That’s how He feels about us! How about that! *bulu roma stands* Haha…Even when we’ve done all the wrong things, spoken all the wrong words, thought of all the wrong thoughts, He is passionately loving us! It’s like hugging, kissing and embracing someone that just rolled in mud in a piggy farm!

I’m forever grateful…so assuring to know that Someone that has all authority and power, Someone that has set the stars and universe in order, Someone that has placed every law that governs Science and how everything works loves me unconditionally, and with great passion and intensity! *tears well up again*

Because of You

Because of You, I was borned again
Because of You, I’m ransomed by Your Grace
Because of You, my heart has found a Home
A refuge for my soul

Because of You, sins are washed away
Because of You, heaven knows my name
Because of You, I can live again
You’ve broken every chain

Unfailing Love, so unreserved
You gave Yourself on Calary
And now I stand, forever free
My Saviour rescued me

Because of You, the weak say “I’m strong”
Because of You, the broken have a song
Because of You, there’s no need to fear
Hope steadfast, ever sure

Now heavens, be open
Our God is unshaken
We worship, Christ risen
High above

Now heaven, be open
All kingdoms, all nations
Declare that “You are God”

My today

Lately, SUNshine has been learning to treasure her “today”s as much as possible. I’m someone who walks away from my past pretty well and run towards my future with great excitement! But sometimes, I need to consciously remind myself that it’s my “today” that matters. Your “today” is the only day you  can do something about! No wonder it’s called the “present”. And I wake up every morning, smile and greet good morning to the Love of my life and ask Him to make my “today” the best day of my life! And I always remind myself to make the best out of my “today”.

Today was a very interesting day for SUNshine! It was random and odd! Haha…Here goes my dairy for the day.

SUNshine woke up as usual, smiled and greeted Da Da good morning and prayed that I’ll make the best out of my today. Got my breakfast, ate and went to uni. Class was challenging because it was raining, the lights were turned off so that we can see the powerpoint presentation clearly and the air-condition was on. This atmosphere gave me a condition called: bilateral ptosis (drooping of eyelids)! Haha….I struggled to stay awake!

Then I was free for the day because teaching in wards were cancelled I think because we are barred from the wards due to the examinations. So, we had a long lunch and a good chat. Then SUNshine spent some time catching up on reading my textbook. The weather was so beautiful, I decided to go for a swim in the afternoon.

Amazingly, Mr Sun decided to make an appearance when I was swimming. Perhaps, because I’m Little Miss SUNshine! Aih..yeah…got another tan! And then, there was an elderly gentleman who saw the way i swam and decided to give me some tips to swim better! Random eh? He taught me well! Oh no..what did Mama say about not talking to strangers? Haha..No worries. He’s benign.

Then I got home and started my daily date with the Love of my life. Was picking up lessons from Queen Esther. Then I had a sudden surge of missing my family in church! I’m always thinking about them and wish I have all the time in the world to be with them. I got so emo I cried! I wonder if they love me this much too? And to think I’ll be away from them for a while made me even more emo! But family stays together right? Sniff! I also was very much reminded of the passion and purpose in my life! Amazing! It’s like receiving oxygen when you have difficulty in breathing! refreshing and life saving!

So, there you have it: my today! Hehe… I really think I’m very blessed! i sure hope I’m a blessing to the people I love and the people around me.